Life Changes on a Dime

He paced up and down on the porch,
feeling hot and restless,
running nervous fingers through his hair.
-Nial Kent
"The Divided Path

Who coined that phrase ‘Life Changes On a Dime’? It really is a true point in thought.

On July 30, 2009 my cell phone rang at around 2:30PM and it was Bob Lewis. Who is Bob Lewis? Well, he is the father of my sister-in-law, Sherri Lewis-Armijo. When one gets a phone call from someone who does not call very often it is usually a cause for concern.

Bob called to inform me that Sherri (my sister-in-law) was in a four car pile-up accident on July 29, 2009. She was the only one to get hurt, breaking both of her forearms. She was in surgery from 6PM until 2AM.

The next morning (July 31, 2009) I updated my Face Book status to this:

Michael J Armijo is upset & sad after learning yesterday that my sis-in-law (Sherri) was in a 4-car pile-up accident. She was the only one hurt: broke both forearms & was in surgery from 6pm till 2am on Wednesday!!! ;(

I received an overwhelming response for her ‘getting well soon’.
That evening I received this heartwarming email from my niece, Holly Alyssa Armijo, who wrote:

PHOTO: Holly A Armijo,
April 2009

Hey Uncle Mike,

I’m not sure if you heard yet, but my mom got in a really bad car accident yesterday morning. It was a chain reaction and my mom was the 4th and last car.

There was nobody in the car with her but she was the only one that got hurt. She broke both of her arms from her elbow to her wrists (her forearms). She broke pretty much all the bones in her forearm and in more than one place. I’m not sure about the numbers but I know her right arm had about 6-8 breaks. Her left arm had about 4 breaks.

She was in surgery all last night because they are putting metal plates or whatever they are called in her arms. Depending on how she is feeling they may release her tonight...or hold her for a couple of days.

There is no permanent damage and she will be OK. She really is a strong woman and I know she can pull through this, even though she won’t be able to use her arms for a while and will need a lot of assistance.

Sorry to put a damper on your day. I love you very much.

-Holly

PHOTO: Ilene R Kaplan,
January 2009
One dear family friend (Ilene Rosenzweig-Kaplan) had emailed me that she and her husband were just talking about how ‘Life can change on a dime’.

It is a reminder to us all that when things like this happen we must treasure our time here. We are so thankful that this accident was not fatal as so many can be. Shower the people you love with love.
http://www.bing.com/videos/search?q=shower+the+people+lyrics&docid=987654783117&mid=4CF802460ECF2FE640DC4CF802460ECF2FE640DC&FORM=VIVR#


Twenty-five years ago today:

August 10, 1984
Friday

I did my usual exercises in the morning (fifty arm curls, fifty push-ups, one-hundred and a half sit-ups and one-hundred jump ropes). It was not too exciting to know that Linda Nannizzi had called in sick. I would not be seeing her at the BART station. Oh well…

Training was a long, dull, trying day as we learned about Directory listings. Peggy (one of the instructors) keeps teasing me. I get even with her though. I think I am her ‘pet’ in class.
After work I walked to the Embarcadero area and waited until Ron Shelly showed up with Jim (the fat Mexican that French-kissed Karyn on her Birthday without her consent). Ron gave me my repaired bicycle pendant. Ron and I had a good talk about relationships and ‘the like’. While we were seated Ron unexpectedly grabbed my leg.
“You have nice legs,” Ron said.
I did not bother to say ‘most bikers do’.

Later that evening (and after a few drinks) Ryan grabbed my rear end while my back was turned. It was obvious that it was him.

Karyn was being her usually bubbly, friendly and ‘touchy’ self. I had finished about three Long-Island Iced-Teas.

Ryan and I went downstairs and I snorted a little coke (cocaine) from his key. This was very unlike me but I was feeling adventurous. Later, Ryan, Ron and Maurice went to Maurice’s mom’s car for some additional coke snorting (not me).

And then, even later that evening Ron and I went into some bathroom to snort another line. I thought it was really nice of ‘Ron and Ryan’ to want to share their lines of coke with me. I, especially, like Ron. We talked again about being Gemini’s, and the topics of love and lust. Ron complements so nicely, too.
“You’re good-looking,” Ron said.
He is being too nice. I have to be honest and truthful here. Everyone likes to hear nice things about oneself from someone new every once in a while.

PHOTO: Gemini image ceramics
I painted the brunette while my mother painted the blond during one rainy day in Alameda, California 'way back when'.

We all ended up dancing at Barnaby’s until about 11:30PM. We followed the wild atmosphere by going to a quiet bar.

The new destination was the downstairs lobby of the Hotel Miramar on Market Street (a tacky Hotel bar if you ask me).
Karyn, Tom Kidwell, ‘Ron and Ryan’ and I moved on to ‘Ron and Ryan’s’ apartment and we all spent the night there!

“If you get stood up I’ll leave with you to some other bars,” Ron told me.
I laughed and continued to think of him as very ‘cool’.

Karyn and I slept together on a very uncomfortable box spring. It was twenty-something amusement. It was cool. We woke up at 8AM. Ron had to go to work. Karyn drove me to the BART station. I drove Tom Kidwell home (he lives in Alameda, too). Tom said he went out with Renee Miller and knows Don Cotton (Suzy’s infatuation and ex-boyfriend), too. Tom said he had just attended Don’s wedding. It’s a small world after all.

I was just relieved that my car was untouched after being at the Fruitvale BART station parking lot all night.

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Determined Daddy

“I need to feel needed.
Nobody needs me now.”
-as heard while watching
the 1998 mini-series
"More Tales of the City"

I have a true-story to share. There is a 41 year old gay man I met through a mutual friend recently. We’ll just call him Joe to respect his privacy. I had actually met Joe about three or four years ago at a concert. He is a mere acquaintance. I couldn’t even tell you his surname. During the most recent meeting on August 2, 2009 the question popped up as to what was going on in his life. I was quite surprised to learn of his latest endeavor.
“Well, I’m going to be a father soon,” Joe said.

Joe has wanted to be a daddy for a longtime now. He insists that it’s an inherent ancestral trait that all men want to have children and pass on their lineage/bloodline. He grew up with two or three sisters. He discussed his decision with his sisters (and his parents) about his move forward to have children and they are relatively uncertain, but supportive.

Joe has never had intimate relations with a woman, so he decided to take the scientific method.
“Oh, there are services out there now and you can get what you want,” he said.

Joe says he found a woman who met his requirements (she happens to be a medical student). She donated her egg. He showed us a photograph of a beautiful blond woman as he described her as the ideal female specimen. That was a bit ‘too strangely scientific’ a description—if you ask me. He had apparently screened almost a hundred women before selecting this twenty-four year old woman (he also made a point of saying that this was the perfect age). Who knew there was a market for this sort of thing going on? To hear this detail was a surprise to me. It was a surprise for a single person to scientifically plan his organized family.

The medical student/egg donor was paid approximately $15,000. Through his doctor who was performing and aligning all of this artificial insemination, egg donorship and implanting a woman was also screened and selected who happens to live in Idaho. This surrogate mother was paid approximately $35,000. She (a married woman who has done this before) is about to give birth to “twins” around the end of October 2009.

Joe said, “The egg donor is of Swedish and German descent. I will explain to the children that I simply signed papers, so they don’t have a mother. I will be their family.”
I could NOT believe that he said that. I had to interject.
“You have to tell the children everything you know. And you must show them the photograph of that woman who is their biological mother. When the time is right you cannot make it sound like they were simply a science experiment!”
Joe listened with interest and understood my reasoning.

Joe has already chosen names (R & D). I’ll just call them “Research” and “Development” for humorous reasons at this point. I simply hope all works out for this single gay-father to be.

“It has cost me about $100,000 to do all of this,” Joe stated.
This could be a soap-opera beginning concept for a new generation in the 21st Century. What a wild story, huh? Ironically, I am ninety-nine percent sure that I helped influence his choice as my ‘sperm donation’ story of 1984 was shared to him a few years ago. I seem to recall about his goal to have children someday. His wish is becoming reality.

Twenty-five years ago today:

August 7, 1984
Tuesday

Some dude from New York with Puerto Rican heritage named Anthony Ramirez spoke to me in the office lounge today.
“Are you gay?” Ramirez asked.
“More straight,” I replied. And why I answered this way is beyond me. I guess I did not want him to treat me differently no matter what my sexual preference may or may not be.

Linda just barely made the 7:25AM BART train today. I gave her my business card that I bought at Merrill’s Drugstore which was imprinted ‘I LOVE WHAT JUST ONE LITTLE THOUGHT OF YOU CAN DO FOR MY DAY’.
She smiled at the card.
“My Dad may end up moving to Los Angeles,” Linda said, “he works for a company called Bechtel Engineering.”
We made arrangements to meet at the corner of Van Ness and Market Streets for lunch today.
“I’ll wait until about half past one,” I said without realizing that it would be such a walk from Folsom Street. I arrived at 1:20PM and there was no sign of her anywhere. I ended up eating alone at Zim’s thinking to myself, “That damn wench…stood up again!”

The training day was not so bad today. Bobbie, the frizzy haired lady from Marin; Joe, the gay guy with the ‘My Favorite Martian’ looks and Barbara Reynolds all make it fun.

I was hesitant about going to Barnaby’s after work for a drink to celebrate Karyn Kossoff’s birthday…but I went anyway. I was early and I dislike ‘the waiting game’. I devoured some hors d’oeurves while I waited, sipping my White Russian cocktail. I recognized Sheila come in but pretended I did not notice her.

Soon, Karyn arrived and I greeted her with a birthday kiss. She actually brought me a piece of her birthday cake. What a sweetheart!

The table was complete. By 8PM it was me, Karyn, Barry, Tom, Sheila, Laura, Jim, ‘Ron and Ryan’. I was the minority. They are all blond and I was the only brunette. I really had lots of fun. I danced a good amount. ‘Ron and Ryan’ make for an interesting couple and they are really nice. Later that evening, Ron took my broken bike pendant and gave me his business card.
“You can pick up my accomplishment of fixing your broken bike at the jewelry shop where I work,” Ron said.
“Okay, maybe I can look at some of the men’s’ rings at your store on Friday, too.”
Who knows? Maybe I will end up having a drink at Barnaby’s this Friday night once again. I like the music they play there.

“I like the way you refer to Gemini’s as dynamic people,” Ron said, “I was born on June 9, 1961.” Ron is only twenty-three and kind of immature—at times---but a very nice guy.

Ryan wants Karyn and me to go to see CHAKA KHAN at the Circle Star Theater with them on September 14th. I was so thrilled that Ryan wanted to include me. I really like these people.

“I just want to solely be a ‘Happy Man’. Do you know that song by “The Greg Khin Band” called ‘Happy Man’?” I asked Ron as we had this private conversation.
“Yes, I have heard that tune,” Ron replied.
“Well, I’ve considered mutual male love but I have never got into it and don’t know who…what or where,” I blatantly said aloud with a straight face. In other words, I played naïve.
“Just stay away from Ryan,” Ron said, “just kidding.”
“As long as he stays away from me,” I replied with a kind of an interested smile.
“Really…I am the one that should be worried,” Ron added.

‘Ron and Ryan’ left abruptly but it was strange that they left because they had invited Karyn and me over to their place earlier in the evening. Karyn called them from the BART station.
“Oh come on over,” Ron repeated.
We forfeited the BART train at 11:45PM and when we took a taxicab to Ryan’s pad his doorbell did not work. I thought I liked these people. Why weren’t they at home now? Could they have had an argument? Karyn called them once again and their answering machine came on. We left a few ‘not so nice’ messages and took a taxicab all the way back to the Fruitvale BART station (from San Francisco).

We entered my mustang and drove to my pad. Karyn really is so much fun.
“I had a nice birthday,” Karyn said giggling.
I feel that I can be very open with her. In fact, I told her something tonight that I have told no one. I told her about my donation as donor number “151” to the Bay Area Sperm Bank.
“I am sort of iffy about our relationship because of Linda and Suzy,” I confessed aloud. It’s amazing what a few drinks can do. I guess I was making excuses to tone down our relationship.

“Wait a minute, I’m confused. I’m attracted to you and I...,” Karyn started to say as a sigh followed.
The last thing I wanted was her confusion to do was lean towards the question of my homosexuality again. I believe that is why I chose to speak of Linda and Suzy.

I guess I enjoyed this night because Karyn, Ron and Ryan were all giving me attention. Everyone likes to be ‘a new attraction’ of sorts. Only time will tell.

Karyn looked at more of my pictures and then we ‘turned in’ for the night. I fell asleep quickly.

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The Future Is One's Past

It is scary to discover that one's future is also one's past.
The anticipation of a world is inevitably the myth of an eternal return.
-Jules Verne
"Paris in the Twentieth Century"
(The Lost Novel)

Michael, 'The Gemini'
At 11:59pm Pacific Time I was born fifty years ago today (May 26th) in Oakland, California. I celebrate my 'New 30' in Barcelona, Spain. Viva Espana!

Twenty-five years ago today:

May 26, 1984
Saturday

What a way to start my Birthday morning!
Chris’ lower back was ‘killing him’. He couldn’t take it and I didn’t know what to do. The pain eventually subsided and we managed to have a great morning. We showered and then headed for Carmel.

We ate at a nice outdoor restaurant after I bought a cool, new pair of shoes. The shopping could not be helped among all of the neat little shops.

It looked like the weather was going to be nice but it remained gloomy so we decided to head for the Santa Cruz-Los Gatos area.

We found our way to Seacliff Beach in Aptos, CA. We enjoyed the ‘walk & talk’ as we checked out this entirely new beach, feeling the warm sun along the way. We had fun joking around about the nice bods, the grody bods and the great lookin’ asses and vice versa. It made me laugh hearing Chris talk so spontaneously and directly. There was no jealousy involved either. It was just plain summer fun and goofing off.

PHOTO: by LaWanda Wilson-Cornmesser

We were soon in Los Gatos, CA where we had ice-cream at Swensons. The traffic was hectic for a good while but I had my share of cool, alternative tunes to help pass the time.

Before long we were back in Alameda. Chris fled to Concord to change clothes and shower. Chris returned about two hours later and we ventured over to San Francisco’s Top of the Mark to see the wonderful City Lights view on my 25th Birthday.

I was feeling tired after the long day. We left the Top of the Mark and walked (regretfully) to Polk Street and walked into a 24 hour restaurant called GRUBSTEAK. It was a drastic change from the Top of the Mark clientele. We left as Chris started to feel tired, too.

I had to drive home with Chris dozin’ off. He was not in the mood for ‘anything’. So I remained silent listening to mellow tunes. When we arrived home Chris fell asleep in his car and I went inside to sleep in the house. He didn’t want to come in, so I left. I guess he left after his nap (or maybe after a scary dream of me or some other face knocking on his window).

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Carnal Pleasure

Trust your aversions the same as you do your cravings.
-Ira Levin,
Rosemary's Baby

There are some places you just never forget. This time it is a restaurant in Buenos Aires, Argentina called "Te Matare Ramirez".
Translated it literally means "I'm going to kill you, Ramirez!" It comes from playful arguments the owner would have with a friend who was a sort of Casanova, and this was a threat the friend often heard from the husbands whose wives he was carrying on affairs with.

When Alan and I dined here alone one evening in February 2008 we were quite taken by the red velvet darkness and sensual aura of the establishment. I was so in awe of the menu that the 'sweet talking' with the hostess paid off. She allowed me to take a menu home as a souvenir. I found the menu yesterday after some careful desk reorganization.

I will focus my next few blogs on the words within the menu by Isabel Allende, Franz Von Bayros, Pablo Picasso, Utagawa Kuniyasu, Salome. I will also share the delightful descriptions of their salads, starters, main courses and desserts. It's worthwhile reading.

If you should ever find yourself in Buenos Aires this is the place you must NOT miss.
http://www.frommers.com/destinations/buenosaires/D55886.html

First page of the menu at "Te Matare Ramirez":

The most intense carnal pleasure,
slowly revealed in a messy clandestine bed,
a perfect mixture of caresses,
laughter and mind games, has the taste of a baguette, of prosciutto,
of French cheese and wine of the Rhine.
I cannot dissociate food from eroticism and I see no reason to do it.
Far from it, I do intend to keep on enjoying them for as long as I have enough joy and energy to do so.
-Isabel Allende

Twenty-five years ago today:

Tuesday, March 27, 1984

I accompanied Helen to her new apartment on 7th Avenue in Oakland. She needed to accept her keys. It is an okay pad. The area is safe near the Grand Lake Theater.

I did my usual bike ride after work. I had to drop by Dad's house because I locked myself out of the house (not remembering to tie my house key to my shoelace). Mom and Dad held the spare keys at their house.

I took a drive into San Leandro later that evening. I stopped at Nadine's but she wasn't at home (again).

I did it. I went to the skating rink. Some lesbian named Maureen treated me to a beer. That's a 'first'. I saw Ned (Frank Vasconcellos' friend).
"Where have you been?" Ned asked.
"Around," I replied.
I browsed the foolish skaters as they went round and round. I recognized Jim, Don, Toni and George Jones' cousin (his name escapes me), Kevin (the one who recognized me in Alameda last Sunday), and Eddie. They all said 'hi' or 'greeted' me in some way. I consider a nod as a greeting, too.

George Jones (who I also noticed) avoided me like the plague. He ignored me. I chose to let it pass, realizing it is his loss. I am kind of glad he did not talk to me. It would be an awkward moment.

PHOTO: 1983-George Jones on the hood of my car

While at the skating rink on this night I met someone new. His name is Michael Thoennes. He was accompanied by a black girlfriend. The black girlfriend is the one who approached me.
"He thinks you are gorgeous," the black girlfriend said to me as I sipped my beer.
I smiled at Michael Thoennes, thinking he resembled George Jones in a slight way. This wasn't exactly a good thing. We started to exchange introductory words. He is a Gemini like myself, born on May 23. He is 23 years old.
"I thought for sure you were about nineteen," Thoennes said in disbelief.
I had to prove my age with my drivers license. I was twenty-four and soon-to-be a quarter of a century on May 26, 1984.

Thoennes treated me to another beer. I knocked him on his smoking habit. He agreed that it was bad, leading me to believe he might quit one day. I handed him my card. I persisted negatively about his smoking habit. I sensed that he felt disapproval of me for continuing to knock his inhaling of the poisonous smoke.
"I just hate it," I continued in reference to the smell of the smoke.

Subjects changed. Michael Thoennes suggested we visit a nude beach that he knew further south of Santa Cruz sometime in the near future.
"Sounds interesting." I said with a bit of hidden fear and curiosity over the idea.
"Maybe I can go around April 7th after my Arcata excursion," I thought silently to myself. How naughty am I?

Thoennes handed my business card back to me after I made one additional snide remark to his smoking habit. He couldn't take one more degrading remark about the disgusting smoke. I accepted my card back and shrugged nonchalantly. Before Michael Thoennes left for the evening he approached me again.
"I want that card back," he said with an apologetic shyness.
I gave it back to him hesitantly.

"I'll give you Michael Thoennes' telephone number before the night is over," Don had said earlier. I left before he gave it to me. I figured Thoennes had more than enough chances to give me his telephone number. I did not intend to stand around the rink (alone), waiting for him to come around.

I went to bed on this night wondering what turn of events will occur in my near future.

Paloma Sanchez-Guerra has not called me.

Nadine DeShera hasn't contacted me about this Saturdays' BBQ that we had tentatively planned.

Chris Cordellos is in Arcata, CA, stuck in the US Coast Guard for who knows how long.

And now Michael Thoennes of Milpitas, CA has entered the picture.
"That damn smoking," I thought.
I slept with intentions of riding my bike to work the next day. I was so "beered out" that I doubted I could wake up easily in the morning.

I still yearn to fly out of SFO Airport this Friday night. It will be fun to get away out in this unknown Northern California country setting until next Wednesday. Five days and four nights of escape and pleasures are ahead of me.

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Compliments From The Heart

“There was something more enticing here…the thrill of the hunt.”
--John DiCarlo
In ‘Telling Tales Out of School’

Compliments from the heart elevate others’ spirit and will often result in an encouraging word from someone else…a domino effect.

Twenty-five years ago:

Tuesday, February 28, 1984

I am in a new section at work now. My new supervisor is black. Her name is Gerri Rogers. There is something about her that ‘grosses me out’. I can’t quite put my finger on what it is. Helen is in my section now, so that is nice.
My brother, Tony, played chef tonight. He made tortellini for John and me at our pad.
John bought some new bar bells. He surprised me when he showed off his two new record albums: Nena Hagen and Billy Idol.
I now realize that John has varied tastes—-but then--isn’t that the case for all who are GEMINI?

I was released from my ART Class early due to our instructor’s mild cold. I bet he just wanted to get out of class to see The Grammy Awards. I ended up catching some of the show. Culture Club won the Best New Group category. Boy George made me laugh.
“Thanks America, you know a good drag queen when you see one.”
Boy George is too much.

Chris Cordellos called at eleven o’clock to tell me he went to see ‘Terms of Endearment’ in Arcata, CA.
We talked about possibly meeting up tomorrow since he said he would be back in Concord. We shall see how the timing goes.

It was funny as I thought to myself. “I do have an appointment after work at the Sperm Bank.”

Wednesday, February 29, 1984

I kept my appointment at The Bay Area Sperm Bank. It was a fascinating first visit. I believe it is an excellent choice for me. I get a free medical check-up, too.
“You have an excellent sperm count at 175+,” says the Sperm Bank representative.
I had to masturbate in a room to some tunes and shoot it into a Styrofoam cup. It was a bit difficult—at first—but I did it. If this works out I wonder if I could have a lot of kids. They may be half-way decent looking kids at that! At age eighteen the child will have the option to look me up. I simply have to keep my locale information up-to-date. I am told my identity (and address) is kept strictly confidential. It is an exciting way to disperse myself into society here, there and everywhere. Besides helping the woman in need I am leaving a part of me. Won’t this unknown child be lucky?

Paige LaBris called me from Sacramento, CA that evening. She wanted to come to visit this weekend. However, the weekend is closed for Chris Cordellos’ 21st Birthday activities. It was very pleasant reconnecting with Paige. I persuaded her to come for that visit next weekend. We discussed the possibility of driving south to Carmel-by-the-Sea. It will be nice to see her again.

Chris Cordellos arrived while I was watching ‘Dynasty’. We took a walk to the Harbor Bay Landing lagoon. We had a late-night breakfast at Denny’s and returned to my pad for a “semi-dessert”. I learned that his neck is very ticklish. Chris seemed nervous when he first arrived. Why this is so is still a mystery. Is he ‘too much in like’ or ‘smitten’? Who knows? I do like that coy way about him.

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The Benefits of Tomatoes

I was in the car with Alan yesterday when we heard that eating tomatoes tend to make one look more beautiful. I laughed because my choice beverage on airline flights is tomato juice. Apparently, there is a magical component in tomatoes that research is beginning to show could protect our skin from UV damage from sunburn. It’s called lycopene and it is a very effective antioxidant. About 85% of lycopene in the western diet is obtained ONLY from tomatoes and the best place to find it is in tomato paste.

Cancers such as prostate cancer, cervical cancer, colon cancer, rectal cancer, and cancers of the stomach, mouth, pharynx, and esophagus have all been proven to be staved off by high levels of Lycopene.

Tomatoes are loaded with all kinds of health benefits for the body. Tomatoes are by far the healthiest of the fruits and vegetables with the power to ward off some of the worst known diseases to man. Be sure to get your fair share!

This morning Alan clipped the Los Angeles times horoscope for me to read. For all of you GEMINI people:

'When you say the name of your loved one, do it only in a loving way.
The utterance of those words can cast a magic spell today, as your attention is all this person craves.'

Hmmm...I guess it was meant for Alan to hand me this one. Too funny.

Twenty-five years ago today:

December 16, 1983
Oakland, California

Work was fun once again but Salima was not at work today. It was Beth's last day as she accepted a new job transfer. Many people brought her going away gifts. She will be missed. She is happy (and sad). I am sure. I saw her cry today. It must be an emotional time.

After work I couldn't get into the mood of working out at the gym. I chose to go to San Francisco to check out the Rathskellum joint that QUAKE-FM99 radio keeps advertising for Friday nights. I foolishly arrived too early and it was a dead scene. I left and walked around the city until I found myself in a little museum near Jones Street that was showing some erotic video flick of a fat police officer undressing to reveal a young, blond stripper. It was really bad entertainment. I chose to move on and simply go home, chalking it up as a dud Friday night.

The line at Jack-In-The-Box was too long so I cancelled my craving for a vanilla milkshake. I showered and immediately fell asleep. When Bill called during the start of a dream I answered the phone groggily. I think he said he'd call back in the morning.

Oh yea! Sue asked if I would like to RD (Research and Develop) as assistant manager in the office today. I said, "Sure". I will be conducting our section meeting Monday too. This should be interesting.

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