Don't Misunderstand Me

I want to explain, because it is suddenly extremely urgent and important that, in the end, we are not misunderstood.
-Morag Joss
in the book "Half Broken Things"

There was another song I heard repeatedly while driving along in France and Spain in May 2009 that caught my ear. It is called 'World, Hold On' and I share the tune with you today. It has a special beat while it reminds us all to brace ourselves and 'open up your heart' to what you really feel.
http://www.bing.com/videos/search?q=world+hold+on+lyrics&docid=872954659610&mid=1E0B4C6A76FE1B4CCFE71E0B4C6A76FE1B4CCFE7&FORM=VIVR5

Twenty-five years ago today:

July 5, 1984
Thursday

I have only one more workday in Downtown Oakland!

I telephoned Frank Vasconcellos on my lunch break because I had no plans at lunchtime. Frank had said he would come over to visit tonight. I had forgotten about that.

I rushed home after work and had a quick light bite at mom’s place.

At about 6:15PM Frank called from the Fruitvale BART (Bay Area Rapid Transit) station where I picked him up (of course). I introduced Frank to my pad here at: 3348 Solomon Lane. He seemed rather impressed with the townhouse but did not talk about it much. I think he wanted to 'move in'. We decided to go to the Red Robin in San Leandro for a drink. I had an avocado burger and a melon ball. Frank enjoyed a banana milkshake.

We went for a ride into the Hayward Hills and we caught up on each others’ latest “goings on”. It was fun because we laughed a lot about nonsense. I drove Frank home where I had a glass of water and was cordially introduced to his mother and sister.

Frank told me he was having some trouble with some new guy named Carlos. Earlier in the evening I had fun reading him old entry excerpts from my journal/diary. He liked hearing the parts about him from our old times. The June 1983 parts from when we had first met were fascinating to him.

I came home and crashed on my bed for a while. I called Mary (Danny’s roommate) and was speaking to her when my call waiting interrupted. It was Danny Garcia calling me from San Jose, California.
“You won’t believe it. I placed eighth and did not make the finals,” Danny said in a sad, monotone voice.
I could tell Danny was feeling down. I tried to encourage him as he seemed to quickly ‘get over it’.
“Listen why don’t you come over tomorrow?” Danny asked.
“Okay,” I said happily, “That’s a great idea”.

Read More

A Fun-Filled Day With Frederic

"Every experience shapes us
to who we will become."
-as heard while watching
the TV series, KYLE-XY, Season I
If you have been following my blog you may recall the framed collage gift that I sent to Paris, France to the L'Osteria Ristorante. I was so happy to see it hanging in the Ristorante on May 21st when I peeked into the window (the Ristorante was closed at the time). I had arranged a lunch with Frederic Deltour on May 22, 2009 at this same Ristorante. I was hoping he would show up. Who could be certain that he would?

When Alan and I were in Paris in December 2006 we saw Paloma, her husband, Alexandre, and their son, Jonathan. I tried to see Frederic but he was out of town at this time.

In July 2008 we found ourselves in Paris once again but I neglected to notify Frederic until the last minute. He read my email 'too late' and we had already come and gone.

This time it all worked out. We were to meet at 1 o'clock. Alan went inside the restaurant to see if he was inside. I remained outside as 'lookout' on the Rue de Sevigne. As I turned around I recognized Frederic straightaway. I smiled and he smiled back handsomely. It was as if we'd been 'old chums' who simply had not seen each other in a few years. The reality was that it was our first meeting. I hugged him 'hello'. Alan did the same and we entered the most fantastic Italian eatery we know in Paris.


I pointed out my framed Art collage that was now hanging inside the place. Frederic shared a lot of interesting facts about himself. He is involved with a business now but has a passion for MEDITATION. He hopes to create an annual MEDITATION trip/hike in the South of France and other global locations. I hope to participate as 'meditation' is something I strive to incorporate more into my life. In my opinion 'meditation' is all about being PEACEFUL with body, mind and spirit (and letting it shine and pass on to those around you).

Frederic's smile would thrill any one. He does possess a magic. He's a pleasure seeker. Yes, I am, too.
"What are your plans today?" Frederic asked.
"We were just going to walk Paris and maybe go to the Gallerie Lafayette food court. We like to be spontaneous," Alan replied.
"Yeah, we like to travel spontaneously," I remarked.
"You're welcome to go with us if you don't have any plans," Alan mentioned politely.
"Sure. I like that 'not planned' way of travel," Frederic said.

PHOTO: Michael J Armijo, Frederic Deltour, Alan Freiman
Outside the L'Osteria Ristorante, Paris, France

Frederic plans to take a trek this summer with his girlfriend to Spain. I learned more about his feelings on meditation and dealing with stress. I stressed the importance of 'balance' in one's life. Frederic's positive energy made us feel at ease in his company. He spent the day walking with us all over Paris. We even got lost for a few minutes. It's fun getting lost in Paris (as long as you eventually find your way).

I look forward to a future journey on one of Frederic's meditation excursions. If you're interested in participating on a meditation/hiking adventure, please leave a comment on this BLOG and I will provide details as they come available.

Twenty-five years ago today:

June 12, 1984, Tuesday

Hoorah! Accomplishment! I am starting my handwritten Journal #5 today. I am proud of myself for having begun all of these stories and 'eventual future memoirs'. I will be even more glad of it during my retirement days. I am sure. What will I have remembered and what refreshed memories will return?

I went for my typical bicycle ride this evening until 7PM. It was a good, "meditational" ride. I wondered if Chris was wondering if I was riding while he was riding. Now that his car is parked here he rides his bike to and from the military base. It is very difficult for him, considering the mountaineering type of bike that he has to use. It's no SCHWINN 12-speed Le Tour bike like mine.

"I can't come down on Thursday like I thought because I have to work on Friday," Chris said sadly.
"Ahh, too bad," I said as I took a bite out of an apple.
"I thought I was going to be free on Wednesday but there was a mishap at work. I will probably come next week though," Chris said with a reassuring tone.

It is all 'just as well'. By the time Chris does return for a visit I will be all situated and back in my Solomon Lane townhouse. I went to bed early: at 'nine-ish'.

Read More

Spaghetti

"Those who forget the pasta are condemned to reheat it."

For 2 years, a man was having an affair with an Italian woman.
One night, she confided in him that she was pregnant.

Not wanting to ruin his reputation or his marriage, He told her he would pay her a large sum of money if she would go to Italy to secretly have the child.
If she stayed in Italy to raise the child, he would also provide child support until the child turned 18. She agreed, but asked how he would know when the baby was born.

To keep it discrete, he told her to simply mail him a post card, and write 'Spaghetti' on the back. He would then arrange for the child support payments to begin.
One day, about 9 months later, he came home to his confused wife.
'Honey,' she said, 'you received a very strange post card today.'
'Oh, just give it to me and I'll explain it later,' he said.
The wife obeyed and watched as her husband read the card, turned white, and fainted.

On the card was written:
'Spaghetti, Spaghetti, Spaghetti, Spaghetti, and Spaghetti.
Three with meatballs, two without.
Send extra sauce.'

Twenty-five years ago today:

March 16, 1984

I received an invitation from Helen to drive up to Lake Tahoe for her sister’s (Geneva) wedding. I turned her down because of my definite bike ride date with Debbie Honcik. I had also committed to attending the birthday party for Elisa Berney-Brown’s daughter, Stephanie.

I received AX (Absent without Pay) time which allowed me to leave the office at 1:30pm today. Hoorah! That means four hours cut from my pay. Ouch. Oh well.
I drove over to moms for a while. Then I went to my pad for my bike and rode along until 3:30pm. I decided to stop riding. I started to feel ‘Raindrops Falling on My Head’. (I love that song.)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y0mfSbL_hhQ
I lounged around with my brother John until Sherri arrived. John left for work. Sherri left right afterwards. She is very pregnant. My dad paid me a visit, too.

Finally, Chris called me while Dad was visiting. He wanted to verify where or not I succeeded in getting the BILLY IDOL concert tickets.
“Yeah, I sure did,” I replied.
“Well then I’m definitely coming down by six on Friday the twenty-third,” he confirmed, “I’m sure we’ll have fun.”
He mentioned that he was going out to dinner this evening with some friends. I chose not to disclose any details of what I had learned when I saw the Arcata phone calls on his Concord telephone billing data.
Chris did reveal his new address. He is living on Dow’s Prairie Road…or something like that. He had me wondering about the ‘group of people’ he was going out with tonight.
“You sure do know a lot of people out there,” I announced in the hopes of getting more information.
“I’m starting to,” Chris said.
I will put him on the spot the next time he calls. The good part is that he may be calling back tonight. He mentioned he would try to call back.

PHOTO: A photo I found that reminded me of Chris Cordellos in 1984 but it is actually model, Travis Hanson.

My dad stayed a while longer. Then I watched a bit of TV until I drove out to the MOBIL Station to fill the car with gas. I surprised dad and went to visit him after filling the car. Dad wanted to go out for dinner but we decided to just stay at his place and eat there.

When I returned to the townhouse it seemed more quiet than usual. I listened to music. Tomorrow I will go to H&R Block and make my 11am appointment at The Sperm Bank.

If I should die or if a major accident would occur this journal will be read by someone. I admit that I would be embarrassed to have just any one read what I have written. These are my thoughts. I want to regroup and polish my ideas, words, blunder, facts and stories into a more polished format one day. If I never do all will be well.

If an accident occurred while riding my bicycle I would want all of my female friends to know about my sperm donation. I wonder. I just wonder which of my female friends would choose to carry my child if I were gone. That’s an interesting thought. Yeah. I will definitely keep that appointment tomorrow. So what if I’m a donor father. That child will be blessed in some special way.

Elisa cancelled her daughters’ birthday party to Sunday. It’s just as well. I can work on my fictitious letterhead for my ART class: Cordellos Clothiers Associate Designer - Michael J Armijo.

Read More

To Abide and Endure

He threw me a quince.
I gave him a jade pendant;
No, no just as requital
But to make our love lasting.
He threw me a peach
I gave him an emerald;
No, not just as requital
But to make our love endure.
He threw me a plum,
I gave him a black jade;
No, not just as requital
But to make our love abide.
-The Book of Songs

Twenty-five years ago today:

February 20, 1984,
Monday

It's Washington's Birthday. It is also the fourth day in a row that I have spent partly with Chris Cordellos.

I went to visit mom. My bike was there and I took a good ride. I spent a lot of the day riding with Suzy Miller.

When I returned home I found John getting ready for work. Sherri was there, too. She is getting bigger. The baby is making its presence known.

Mom and Dad are more than likely buying a townhouse on Cook Lane for $124,950. It's a good thing. John will move there and I can remain here.

Chris called to suggest a visit to Alameda via BART. At first I didn't really want him to visit because I knew I'd probably be driving him all the way back to Concord. He ended up coming via BART after all. We had satisfying sex.

It was made easy on me to just drive him to the Fruitvale BART station. I read him a few excerpts from my journal. My words definitely need some polishing and rewrites. But I can't make those revisions until I am age fifty or so.

Read More

My Passion for Photography

"It's A Long Way Home, Dear..."

My dear friend and fellow photographer, Brenda, who resides in Florida purchased a mounted print of my photo illustrated here. Brenda asked me when I first realized my passion for photography. I hesitated. Then I thought long and hard and realized it happened during my Alameda Summers of 1972-1973. I had one of those little Instamatic point and shoot cameras. I saved up money and bought a Bell & Howell movie camera, too. I loved taking candid shots of mom, dad and my brothers. They didn't always appreciated it but I loved capturing 'real life' candid moments. The photographic masterpieces--in my humble opinion--are those where the human subject has no clue a camera is there. It creates an image of pure reality.


The photo illustrated above ("It's A Long Way Home, Dear...") was randomly taken while I was walking over the Brooklyn Bridge in New York. He had no clue. It is a typical candid that tells a story. Photographs leave a lasting "mark" in life. www.redbubble.com/products/configure/4373349"

During the summer of 1973 I had a girlfriend named Bonni Jayne. She came over to visit at my home. I had a brainstorm idea to photo shoot her, using my backyard as the setting. I know I still own those photos in some old photo albums. I should go back and dig them up. "Whatever Happened to Bonni Jayne" sounds a bit like that Bette Davis classic movie, "Whatever Happened to Babe Jane". www.youtube.com/watch?v=-ck-Uo52MOg

A year or so after our high school graduation in June 1977, Bonni Jayne moved to New York. She had a brief stint as a stripper in a night club. She was a bit on the wildside. She had rampant hormones. She taught me how to kiss. While in New York she met an Italian chap with the "Ludovicy" surname. She got pregnant and had Crystal Joy Ludovicy. I'm 99% positive that was her name because I recall teasing Bonni about how it sounded like a new dishwashing liquid or detergent (Crystal Joy).
The marriage did not last long and Bonni moved back to California. She told me how horrible she felt because Mr. Ludovicy and his parents would not allow her to take her baby. She always felt that her Crystal would think she didn't love her when it was far from the truth. The last I heard Bonni had married again and had two or three children and was living somewhere in the Redding, CA area.

In the early 1980's my passion turned to writing in journals. On November 1, 1999 I saw the CEO of Amazon.com (Jeff Bezos) in a guest appearance of the Oprah Winfrey Show. I was in an auto service waiting area in Palm Desert, CA. Mr. Bezos had recently had a baby girl and thought up the idea of a photo-a-day from the day she was born to document his life. He photographed Oprah on that show as a sort of photo journal. The concept of how a picture is worth one-thousand words meant more to me after watching this show. I began taking a photo-a-day on that exact date. I still take a minimum of one photo per day. My passion is still there as I continue to enhance my photographic works with new photo editing techniques. I sometimes upload photos at this site for a daily sort of chronology (if you click here and then click on the ARCHIVES tab you can see a month at a glance of daily photos): www.fotolog.com/michaelarm

Twenty-five years ago

December 23, 1983
I worked until 4 o'clock but it was really a freebie sort of work day. Salima loved the earrings I gifted her. Barbara Reynolds loved me for thinking of her during this festive time with the 'imported bath oil' gift. I kissed Salima and Barbara with Merry Christmas wishes at the end of the day.

While driving home on the freeway I thought I heard a rattling noise from my car. I chose to think nothing of it. Later...after a short holiday nap at mom and dad's house I noticed I had a flat tire. This unfortunate incident blew the date plans for the evening of dancing with Tammy Duhr. She was not thrilled to hear the news...but it was just as well.

My brother, Tony, introduced me to his friend, Ramona. She was very nice.

I walked to my house on Soloman Lane and decided to call Frank Vasconcellos. I invited him over but he had no form of transportation (just like Tammy). It was just as well. I stayed home and watched '79 Park Avenue', a made for TV movie starring Lesley Ann Warren as a high class call girl in New York City in the role of 'Marja' Morgan. She won a Golden Globe in 1977 for her part in this film based on the Harold Robbins best-seller. www.imdb.com/title/tt0075515/

December 24, 1983

I watched the ending of '79 Park Avenue' in the morning. My dad stopped over to pick me up and we went to Mervyn's at South Shore Shopping Center. I bought my brother, John, another gift (a beach towel). My dad and I picked up mom and drove out to Grandma's house for a Christmas Eve visit. I played with my little cousins, Shawn & Shonette West and Jason Lucero for a while. Mom and Dad did some holiday chitchat with Grandma and we left soon afterward.

I read a few articles in my ESQUIRE Magazine. I watched 'An Uncommon Love' and 'Looker' on television with mom and dad.

My brother, John, arrived from work at Noon. My brother, Tony arrived at 12:30pm and we proceeded to open our Christmas presents in the living room. We shared a lot of cutlery this year. I got a new bike shirt from John. A VCR case from mom and 'drinking glasses and placemats' from Tony. All in all I was happy with my gifts. I love the sense of family. We had a great Christmas Eve evening together even if I still had an unrepaired 'flat tire'. Tomorrow is Christmas Day.

December 25, 1983

John and I woke up and got semi-dressed up for the holiday occasion. We went over to our parents' house. We ate. We slept. We watched television. It was an all-around lounging kind of Christmas Day. I felt like I ate all day and evening. Christmas Day is meant to be a lazy sort of day, isn't it? It was fun. The evening dinner brought about the real shocker of the day. John announced that Sherri Lewis was 4 1/2 months along in her pregnancy. He said that I was going to be an uncle before my 25th Birthday. Now that really was one heck of a shocker. I should say so.

I returned to my pad later that night...thinking, dreaming and wondering. Will I ever reach or feel that fatherhood stage in my life?

Oh yes, Suzy Miller came by for Christmas Eve and gave me the coolest gift of a colorful scarf.

Read More

Now and Then: The True Joys In Life

I have returned to the Los Angeles metro (Marina Del Rey, California to be exact) after a weekend in Santa Fe, NM. It was a busy return over the last couple of days with mail, work and other domestic duties. I opened my top desk drawer today and found a handwritten quote that I scribbled a few months ago on my 'Success Begins With A Dream' notepad. I heard the words by the actress, Jacqueline Bisset, while in character during an episode of the cable television series 'Nip Tuck'. She was speaking to Dr. Troy in her provocative tone when she said, "The only true joy in life is being in love and having those feelings reciprocated."

I had to write those words down when I heard them. It was a wonderful, unexpected find for the day. It is always good to be reminded of the true joys in life. Don't you agree?

I saw the film 'The Reader' tonight. I was pleasantly surprised as it seemed to cover all the bases with a few new twists and revisions. I read the book first and I knew most of the intricate details. Now I am on a rampage to read books before I see the film versions. I am hoping to read 'Revolutionary Road' before I see the film version now. After screening 'The Reader' tonight I came up with this idea to revisit some of my old words from years gone by in my very own private journals. Some of it may seem like gibberish, but it might make more sense over time as I continue to share some of the old thoughts. I hope to learn from the flashbacks.

Twenty-five years ago today:

December 15, 1983

The atmosphere at work is so very lax. There is no pressure at all. I am having so much fun working with Salima Nasardeen and Barbara Reynolds.

I walked with Beth Neroda and Salima Nasardeen to the BART (Bay Area Rapid Transit) station. Salima was giving us the 'inside story' on Ida's employee observations of the new Pac Tel Business Office Service Representatives. She spoke of the temporary new Administrator from Walnut Creek. They were typical, funny stories in the world of the telecommunications biz.

I arrived home and prepared myself for Bancheros, a Mexican restaurant that was chosen by co-workers. I met a lot of the Residence Telecommunications Order Center representatives there. It was just an 'okay' sort of time. We laughed. I learned that I like Louis Martini wine (at least that night I did).

After dinner I went to the Stargaze club in Fremont, CA. I asked one girl to dance and she said, "Later". I said later to her in my own mind. I ended up spending the evening with Suzanne Kowalski from Fairfield, CA. She attends Cal State University, Hayward. We danced a lot. I worked off my ravioli. It was fun.
Suzanne now has my personal telephone number. She may call me because she says she might be moving to Berkeley. By the time I arrived back home it was one o'clock in the morning. I crashed.

Read More