A Friend of Oscar

"Realise your youth while you have it. Don't squander the gold of your days, listening to the tedious, trying to improve the hopeless failure, or giving away your life to the ignorant, the common and the vulgar. These are the sickly aims, the false ideals, of our age. Live! Live the wonderful life that is in you!
Let nothing be lost upon you. Be always searching for new sensations.
Be afraid of nothing..."
-Oscar Wilde
"The Picture of Dorian Gray"

Adrian Lichev, of Sofia, Bulgaria wrote the above (by Oscar Wilde) on his FACEBOOK wall. I liked it and thought to post it here on my blog for today.

I remember reading a book once that described a gay man as a "Friend of Oscar". As many of you may know, Oscar Wilde was gay. And so, to say one is a "Friend of Oscar" was a polite way of saying one is 'gay' or a friend of 'gay' people. I prefer the "Friend of Oscar" phrase to the 'gay' word.

Are you a 'Friend of Oscar'?

Twenty-five years ago today:

November 9, 1984
Friday

Today was my interview at MACY's. It was at 1:30pm and I had to be well-dressed. I thought I was dressed 'business fashionable'. I signed up for 'E' time at the office so I could leave early. I was rewarded 'E' time at 11am. I decided to go to MACY's early (11:30am), but they were swamped with new potential hire interviews and they would not meet with me until my scheduled time. And so, I left without much to do. I decided to wait around in The City until my scheduled 1:30pm appointment time.

I went to Cabine International Modeling and met with Gilbert. There were a couple of others in his office but he welcomed me. I remained there until noon, listening to the modeling assignment and photo 'head shot' gibberish. I gave a little input and looked at some of the portrait photos.

My next stop was Wilkes-Bashford. I met up with Bob Umland again. I tried on a pair of dark suede pants. I gave Bob my work telephone number.
"Here's my number, let's arrange lunch or dinner one day," Bob suggested.
"Okay, sounds good."
I'm all for the get-together. He is a great connection for a great wardrobe.

By and by...I dropped into the little Japanese Toy Store for girls. I browsed at a few potential items for Ashley. Then it was time to go to MACY's. I was immediately hired 'on the spot' as a temporary part-time sales clerk in the Men's Fragrances Department. I will begin the new job effective December 10, 1984. They were suggesting I work in hardware (The Cellar) but I preferred Menswear or Electronics. I was content with the Men's Fragrances. I may meet a lot of interesting co-workers and customers.

By 3pm I arrived at mom's house and opened a package that arrived in the mail. It was from SPIEGEL. It included some Christmas gifts for my brothers (John and Tony), mom and dad and Sherri. It was fun seeing mom. She was happy to see me, too. The time flew by and at 3:30pm she was ready to rush off to work at the main post-office in Downtown Oakland. I did share the news about MACY's. She was not at all surprised that I was hired.
"Why?" I asked mom.
"Well look at the way you were dressed."
I wore gray slacks, a sweater, sport jacket, scarf and my fancy umbrella that complemented the outfit.
I left the house at the same time mom did.

I went bicycling and met a guy by South Shore Beach named Chris Lamas. He was just hanging out. I stopped by to rest with my bike and we began to exchange small talk.
"I'm from Tennessee," Chris said.
"How did you end up here?"
"Well, I'm a student nurse and I've only been in Alameda for two and a half months now."
I thought he was 'definitely' gay. I was most definitely in 'no way' interested in him 'cept as perhaps mere friendship. I gave him my telephone number and rushed off. I had to be home to help Helen move out.

When I arrived home I received an immediate call from Chris Lamas. I decided not to go to Helen's after all. She didn't need me. I went to visit Chris Lamas' place on Pacific Avenue. His little apartment was impressive. I admired the antiques and Art Deco era style of it. Bobbie Renbarger would have liked it. She was always into 'Art Deco'. Chris and I walked over to the Acapulco Restaurant for dinner. It was his treat. Hurrah! We returned to his pad and watched a video. He touched my hair and hands but that was the 'extent of it'. I left before anything he wanted to start had started. I was home by 9:15pm and went straight to bed, happy to be under my very own covers.