Down & Out

"True," he said, "in town one can very easily manage to go without what isn't good for one. If one does not do without it, then one has only oneself to blame for the bad consequences. One will be sorry and in this way come to see for the first time really clearly how to manage the next time."
-Franz Kafka
"Wedding Preparations in the Country"

AN EVENING OF CHINESE COFFEE AND CONVERSATION WITH AL PACINO
(USA, 2000); Screened on May 8, 2003 at Tribeca Film Festival
Director: Al Pacino

Pacino's fine adaptation of Ira Lewis' 1992 stage play featuring himself and Jerry Orbach as starving writers living on the fringes of Greenwich Village's artists' community is a labor of love nearly four years in the making. Pacino also directed 'The Local Stigmatic' and 'Looking for Richard'.

My Comments: 3 STARS
This film was filled with interesting dialogue by two so-called friends, living in New York City. They shared words of laughter, sadness, aging pains and simple twangs of living life. I laughed when I heard Jerry Orbach accuse Al Pacino of stealing his word that he used two years ago. It made me think of myself.

I liked seeing Al Pacino playing this aspiring, middle-aged writer who is still trying to 'make it'. The panel discussion with Al Pacino after the screening was a real treat. Pacino confirmed his LOVE for the dramatic play. I got a photo of Al Pacino and Robert DeNiro. Then two solo shots of Pacino. That was cool. I hope the pictures are good.
Twenty-five years ago today:

January 7, 1985
Monday

This morning I called Dr. Hinkle's office to verify my dental appointment for two o'clock on Wednesday.

I telephoned mom from work only to get no answer because Dad took her to the doctor. She has bronchitis and won't be going to work today or tomorrow.

I had a fair day with regard to my sales.

At lunch I went for a large yogurt. I saw Karyn Kossoff walking alone and decided to run up behind her to chat. She seemed withdrawn and 'down and out'. I can't help but think it's because I have been somewhat avoiding her. I did not call her last weekend. In fact, I have not called her at all as of late.
Karen said, "I bought a VCR over the weekend."
I still had that feeling that she was a bit perturbed because (I know) she wants more from me. I can't give her more because I can't help but feel the way I do. I don't love her 'in that way' or feel the tilt like she does.

Brenda Dickson, an actress on The Young & The Restless, has not written back to me after I sent her two cards. (?)
PHOTO: Actress, Brenda Dickson, 1985

After my workday I went to visit mom. Janet Lewis (Sherri's mom) was there with Ashley. Mom still looked under the weather. I spent some time there looking and choosing the developed Christmas pictures I had taken. It was a great time. A lot of the shots are really good.

When Janet and Ashley left I helped mom make 'sloppy joes' and we watched Part II of THE THORN BIRDS. I stayed there until well passed 11PM. I knew Paloma was supposed to call me but I decided to stay there (with ma being sick n' all). I wanted to be near.

Oh yes, Bonnie Jayne called me from New York on Saturday. That was a surprise since it wasn't a collect-call! We had a nice chat. I promised I would write to her.
PHOTO: Bonni Jayne, Alameda High School, Class of 1977

"You haven't got LOST in the woods have you?"
-as heard while watching the 2009
classic film, AVATAR

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Good Answer

I think we all do what we have to, according to who we are and where we find ourselves. We cannot preserve the delusion that we are not mere creatures of clay, or that some of us are at heart any better or any worse than anyone else.
-Morag Joss
"Half Broken Things"

SONG FOR A RAGGY BOY (Ireland, 2002)
Screened: May 8, 2003, Tribeca Film Festival
Director: Aisling Walsh

For the boys who end up at a Catholic reformatory school in 1939 Ireland, attending classes is an exercise in abuse and fear. But new lay teacher William (Aidan Quinn) whose own past has elements of the fascist terror the boys must endure, becomes the boys' protector after standing up to the school's prefect. Quinn turns in a quietly courageous performance in this chilling tale of institutionalized abuse that went unquestioned for far too long.

My Comments: 5 STARS
"Traveling...it broadens the mind."
"You are not to raise the matter with me again!"
The above quotes were just a couple that I wrote down while watching this fantastic film. The story takes one back to 1939. I had no idea it was based on true facts until the very end. It dealt with physical, mental and sexual abuse by priests on Irish-Catholic schoolboys at a reform school. This was the dark, depressing side of the story. It also touched on 'dealing with loss'. Inspiration is here for teachers as boys begin to learn the alphabet and eventually find joy in reading.

Alan said, "I see it as a Catholic priest's DEAD POETS SOCIETY."
I guess it could be seen that way. It is worth watching despite the violent side of it that we don't really want to see. We can only learn from it.

Twenty-five years ago today:

January 6, 1985
Sunday

I called Meta when I arrived home to see if she arrived home safely. Her brother answered with an uptight tone because I had called at 2:30AM. Oooops.

In the morning I telephoned Meta again while she was making quiche and watching the MIAMI Dolphins football game.
She said, "I'll call you later."
Who knows? Time will tell.

I got out of bed at 11AM and then rode my bike to mom's house. I made myself breakfast. Unfortunately, mom is still sick with her cold and not looking up to par.

I went cycling and decided to ride out to Lake Chabot. I was riding from 1PM until 3:30PM. When I returned to mom's house Helen Wong and my brother, Tony, were there. I watched the end of the SF 49er game and sipped on some sparkling apple cider, lemon lime soda and an Orange Juice milkshake. I was thirsty. Then I simply left and went back to my pad.

By 4:30PM I was beginning my nap when Meta called back. She was kind of tired as she had just awoke from a nap. I learned that she works from 4:30AM to Noon usually.
Meta suggested, "Maybe we can go on a picnic next weekend if it's nice."
I was in total agreement to the idea. Our conversation pretty much ended at that point and I went back to sleep, waking at approximately 7PM.

Paloma telephoned at 7:30PM.
"I called you last night and today and you weren't home."
"Oh? I was bike riding today and last night I was at my mom's for a while."
"Well, the body-builder stood me up."
I was pleased to hear her say this until she said, "Yeah, I was pissed at him."

Paloma then asked, "Why would you marry me?"
"For the fun of it," I laughed, "and only because I love you."
"You answered that one well," Paloma said.
Her comments made me wonder who she had spoken to for her to ask these questions. I wonder if she's been comparing notes with her friend, Monica. Monica looks a lot like Michelle Von Thaden and/or Meta (years later). Meta is twenty-nine years old.

I decided to be upfront with Paloma.
"I went out to Baxter's to dance last night. It's a fun place. We should go."
And so, we made tentative arrangements to go there together next weekend.

Cedric Green telephoned to cancel our 'going-out' plans for this Friday. Hurrah!

I placed a telephone order for the Canadian bacon pizza to be delivered. I munched out and watched THE THORN BIRDS movie on TV.

I was so busy there wasn't even time to pee!
-Julia Child
"My Life In France"

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"Let's Get Married"

"I don't quite know what I feel. It is very strange, though, and I never felt anything like it before, but it's like what I had always imagined happiness to be."
-Nial Kent
"The Divided Path"

LOVE OBJECT (USA, 2003), Screened: May 7, 2003,
Tribeca Film Festival
Director: Robert Parigi

Insecure technical writer Kenneth (Desmond Harrington) learns so much about women from his silicone sex doll, Nikki, which he ordered over the internet, that he gets noticed by flesh-and-blood co-worker Lisa (Melissa Sagemiller). It's the start of a beautiful thing, but first he must throw off the guilt with which Nikki is invading his subconscious. Parigi's bizarre love triangle examines the relationship and love with inspired creepiness.

My Comments: ONE STAR
What a let down!
"A relationship is a two way street" was one line I heard in the film. I truly believe in this sentence but it told me a lot about the writer/director. He has had some difficulty in relationships of his own. The concept of a man buying a life-sized rubber doll to "play with" seemed funny. I guess I expected a bit more humor and romance. It turned into a 'sicko' movie with S&M inuendo and violent torture. It really rubbed me the wrong way. I even had a flash of Scott Peterson killing his pregnant wife, Laci. Scary. Gross. I would NEVER recommend this movie to any one. The writer/director clearly stole from the classic 1965 film "The Collector" starring Terence Stamp. The actor in 'LOVE OBJECT' even resembled Terence Stamp.

Twenty-five years ago today:

January 5, 1985
Saturday

I washed my car (finally).

Paloma and I have our date still scheduled (surprisingly).

I am debating on another trip to Baxter's tonight to search for my 'I've Got a Crush On You' maiden, Karen (the Cybil Shepherd lookalike).

I hung out at home this morning, waiting for Paloma to call me. At 10AM I decided to break down and call her just before I went out to wash my car. I didn't want to chance missing her call while I was outside.

Paloma finally arrived at around one o'clock while I was changing into another shirt and sweater because I didn't feel right in what I had originally been wearing. I reminded myself of Meryl Streep (in the film 'Falling In Love') and how she kept changing her clothes for the right outfit for when she was to meet Robert DeNiro. Haha. It was a fun, good movie.

When Paloma arrived we hugged and kissed. It was a gentle kiss. She oogled over my DYNASTY 1985 Calendar, my cups, my black lamp and my bicycle pictorial wall which she claims to have never noticed before (?).

Paloma and I left in my car and cruised around Harbor Bay Isle to SAFEWAY. We saw Ron (the windsurfer) who happened to look at us and nodded 'Hello' to me as Paloma and I walked together towards the store entrance. Then, some strange fellow spontaneously said to us, "Now there's a couple that look really good on the beach."
We both laughed aloud.
I said, "Thank You" to this stranger who happened to be sitting alone under the CINZANO umbrella.

Paloma and I ate hot Canadian Bacon sandwiches, chips, and apple juice at the 'La Val's Pizza' place. Yummy. Paloma took off her blouse that was covering her arms to show me her muscles. I love her body and her green eyes. She's exquisite in terms of a top-notch sensual body. Our conversation was off-beat, spontaneous and carefree.
I asked seriously and non-chalantly. "Hey, why don't we take-off to the Oakland Airport and get married in Las Vegas?"
She was semi-tempted (I think). And at the time I really wanted to do it.

Paloma is so creative and makes me come alive. She makes me feel ever-so-good. We've never had sex yet, but I know she'd feel hot and it'd be nice with a lot of practice. Good sex takes time.

Thereafter, we went to LONGS Drugstore and caused a few more random stares from strangers as we walked together. I loved it. I dropped some film there to get developed. By now it was 2:20PM and "The Cotton Club", starring Richard Gere would begin at 2:30PM. We made the show in plenty of time. We had a cozy time in the theater. Her 'cat eyes' kill me!

"The Cotton Club" was a rateable "B". We enjoyed it. I would probably have preferred seeing "Dune". In fact, I may see that one sometime next week. I like futuristic sci-fi flicks. I think that is why I am falling for Paloma. She is really futuristic, artistic and full of energy. I was dwelling on the "Falling In Love" movie that I had seen and wondered if Paloma and I were at that 'mutual position' of falling in love (?). I feel so high with regard to her. I care for her more and more and more when I am with her. It's like I want her near me more and more all of the time.

After "The Cotton Club" movie we proceeded to Loard's Ice-Cream parlor at the South Shore Shopping Center for ice-cream. We then returned to my place where we fiddled with TAROT cards with uncanny results. Our relationship in the future depicted the ACE OF WANDS* (element of Fire). I chose cards that described her to the fullest while she chose some related to me; whereby, I could most easily relate.

Paloma left not long after we kissed (frenchly 'in-fact'). She was off to meet with some body-builder at the Fitness Center. She was to follow him during a weight training routine. Geez? How should that make me feel? Somehow...I don't really feel jealous because I know she's serious about her body-building.

"Where your treasure is...there will be your heart also" as heard in a preview per St. Matthew via THE THORN BIRDS upcoming TV-movie on Sunday Night, January 5, 1985.

When Paloma left I left also. I went to mom's house and hung out there. Mom was sick, coughing, etc. I decided to leave at 8PM for Baxter's in Concord.

I saw Karen, the fantasy waitress. I learned that she has a boyfriend.
"We're practically married," Karen said, "I have no complaints."
And yet, she referred to me as a "sweetheart" with smiles and eyes on me continuously throughout the night.
"I'll see you next week," Karen said as the night got darker.
I thought silently, "It's beyond me."

I also met a gal named Karen Santi-Reynolds. It's funny that she is named Karen, too. I chose to nickname her 'Ms. Pearl Drops'. She was sweet despite three things I learned after some chit-chat: 1)her cigarettes, 2) the fact that she was wearing her ex-husband's Christmas present and 3) her 3-year old daughter.
I remember when she said, "I hate jealous men!"
I thought that with some men there may be good reason to be jealous. She rates high as one to be jealous of 'in my book'.
"We are divorcing because my husband liked to fool around too much," she said.

I also met Meta, a slightly overweight blond that resembled Michelle Von Thaden (a girl I dated in Sacramento when I was in college).
Meta announced, "I work for World Airlines."
A brief thought of Paloma's yearning to be a flight-attendant crossed by mind. Meta proceeded to share how she can take round-trip flights to Hawaii for only thirty-two dollars! I was ever so interested.
What got me though was when she asked, "Are you gay?"
I think she asked because I mentioned that I worked in San Francisco and I spoke of those two friends that I met from London, England.
She explained, "No, it's something about your tone of speech that made me think you might be gay."
I replied, "No". Then I said, "Well, maybe Yes."
And so, who knows what she may think now. I was especially caught off-guard when she caught me looking at Karen, the Cybil Shepherd waitress lookalike.
She said, "Quit drooling."

Another good looking blond told me, "You look wasted". This one seemed to shun me away from that comment but she kept eyeing and smiling my way when I was dancing with Meta.

Meta wrote her telephone number on the back of a business card that belonged to 'ERIC STEVENS of Siemer & Hand Travel, Two Embarcadero Center, Suite 1655, SF, CA 94111'. She wrote "META, 538-9940, 577-2176/78 WORK".

*THE ACE OF WANDSThe Ace of Wands is a symbol of possibility in the area of creativity, excitement, adventure, courage and personal power. In readings, it shows that a seed of bold enthusiasm has been planted in your life although you may not yet recognize it. When the seed sprouts, it could take almost any form. It might be a creative idea, surge of optimism or need to act boldly. On the outside, it could be an offer, gift, opportunity, encounter or synchronistic event.

When you see this Ace of Wands, examine your life to see how its potent, confident energy could work for you. Be daring and brave. Sometimes you have to risk to get what you want. Look for the path that will excite you and push you beyond your limits. Seize the initiative, and let your enthusiasm take you to new heights. Wands are the suit of individual power and fulfillment. This Ace of Wands tells you that a time of passion is beginning. You will be able to assert your best for all to see.

The Ace of Wands is also the card of creativity. Under its influence, you can become a conduit for inspiration and invention. Forget tired, worn-out solutions. You have the chance to be original. Trust your own creative potential, and there will be no end to what you can achieve.

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I Remember...

PHOTO:
ARMIJO 'Coat-Of-Arms'

You don't notice how you change until you see a photo of yourself, do you?
-Morag Joss
"Half Broken Things"

1. I remember making a toast on New Year's Eve (December 31, 2009) to "Remembering". I encouraged the other sixteen guests inside of a Napa Valley wine cave to list ten things the next day (January 1, 2010) by writing "I remember..." because memories are what life is all about. I wonder who followed my suggestion (besides me).

2. I remember being four years old (in 1964) and falling in the backyard of our home at '1447 16th Avenue' in Oakland, CA. I hit my nose on a concrete step and my face was a bloody mess. My mom heard my crying and ran to help me. She gave a shriek of a scream at the sight of me. She stopped the bleeding, consoled me as mothers do and managed to get me to take a nap to dream it all away.

3. I remember picking rocks in the backyard of our home at '356 Magnolia Drive' in Alameda, CA with my father in the mid-1970's. We cultivated the earth by shoveling the dirt over. I helped him to start his garden of tomatoes, zucchini, snap peas, onions, carrots and radishes. While I felt disgruntled about the work-at first-it became a great sense of accomplishment.

4. I remember the transition from Catholic School in 5th grade (1970-71) to Public School in 6th grade. I was so thrilled about 'free dress'. I no longer had to wear the gray trousers, white shirt and maroon sweater uniform at St. Anthony's in Oakland, CA any longer.

5. I remember my high school 'Advanced Composition' writing class at Alameda High School. How I loved that early morning requirement time of doing my morning journal entry. I also remember the time we left the classroom for Park Street to explore our five senses (the power of touch, smell, sight, taste, hearing). We had to write words pertaining to each sensory experience. The fresh smell of the donuts at a local bakery remain in my mind as I wrote about it and no one else seemed to use the sense of smell.

6. I remember having the measles in first or second grade and being able to stay home. I would lay on the couch in the afternoon while watching a full-episode of the TV soap "Dark Shadows" with my mother. I remember sleep being the best nurse.

7. I remember the time my sister-in-law (Sherri) called me before midnight on January 24, 2000. My mother had suddenly passed away of a condition known as 'mitral regurgitation'. During the Southwest Air flight from LAX to OAKLAND that morning of January 25th I felt completely numb with a 'nothing matters' feeling. I was in shock; yet, my consolation was from a telephone conversation at 8pm on January 24, 2000. Before I hung up I said those three last words to her, "I love you."

8. I remember moving to Los Angeles in October 1989. I met a man on November 20, 1989 and we exchanged telephone numbers while at a bar known as MICKEY's. During one of our first dinner dates of filet mignon and a bottle of Château de Beaucastel, Chateauneuf-du-Pape, Vallée du Rhône wine I asked him, "Is there really a future in a man-to-man relationship?"
He hesitated and said, "I don't see why not."
Today, I am still in a relationship with this man (Alan Freiman) who obviously gave the right answer.

9. I remember feeling so 'at home' while visiting Zaragoza, Spain and the thrill of seeing the signs to the Armijo Palace. It led me to 'Calle de Lucero', the street where the Armijo Palace is located. I was astonished because my mother's maiden name is Lucero. The Origins of the ARMIJO clan and 'coat of arms' still stir me with fascination and interest.

10. I remember the wonderful escapes of a good book and a great, real-life true story that force me to imagine more...
I remember almost marrying Paloma.
I remember being in a caged ferris wheel ride at the Alameda County Fair in Pleasanton, CA, as a teenager. I persuaded my mother to take the ferris wheel ride with me. While in the thrilling cage of movement we laughed so hard that our stomachs ached in painful delight. What a spontaneous non-stop adventure.
I remember playing croquet and tackle football with my brothers on the front lawn of our home on Harbor Bay Isle.
I remember how music still soothes and touches my heart...here is a favorite:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GYKJuDxYr3I
I remember 'this minute' and feeling like I can continue writing one-hundred or more things that I remember...

MY HOUSE IN UMBRIA (U.K. 2003), Screened on May 7, 2003 @ PACE UNIVERSITY.
Director: Richard Loncraine
My House In Umbria is an exquisitely affecting adaptation of the William Trevor novella that follows a diverse group of train-explosion survivors invited to fellow survivor and romance novelist Mrs. Emily Delahunty's (Maggie Smith) idyllic home in the Italian countryside to recover. The group slowly forms a tender family identity whose resolve is tested when an outsider threatens to break them up. Also featuring Chris Cooper, Timothy Spall, and Giancarlo Giannini.

My Comments: 5 STARS
"Ahhhh"...reminders of the Italian Countryside, good wine and the essence of fragrant flowers in a garden are prominently depicted in this film. The story was centered on the survivors of a train accident. I loved how I cared so much about the characters. The main character role was played by Academy Award winning actress, Maggie Smith (who made it all the more fantastic). I loved hearing her thoughts spoken aloud. She made me laugh. Her loneliness made me sad. I was happy that the little orphan girl ended up staying in Umbria. I'd LOVE to see this film again someday. It is a reminder of how we all need LOVE and PEOPLE to share happy times...as we all make mistakes along the way.

Twenty-five years ago today:

January 4, 1985
Friday

This morning I finally met Christie. She is this girl that I've seen off and on who apparently works one floor above me in the AIC (Accounts Inquiry Center). She is sweet and has a beautiful smile that sort of reminds me of Becky Winslow (a college gal I knew with green eyes who was infatuated with me). Becky was a former semi-girlfriend that never amounted to anything because I moved to Sacramento in 1980. We met in that unique extra credit class called THE FOURTH 'R' (RELAXATION) at the College of Alameda in December 1979. It seems like ancient history now.

I ordered a toaster, a lamp, two fancy Director folding chairs with my winning sales coupons. Hurrah!

At lunch I accompanied David Vigil to MACY's where we gabbed. David said that a male model friend of his (also named David) had borrowed two-hundred dollars and took off with it along with a bunch of his nice clothes.
"Can you believe it? And he left for New York!" David said with a gasp and his gay lisp.
David was 'pissed-off' to say the least. We each ate up a slice of BLONDIE's PIZZA and headed back to the office. As we walked David shared more information.
"You know, Michael, I am on a temporary phase of using cocaine."
I mentioned my coke experience with Bob Umland of Wilkes-Bashford.
David continued. "I'm trying to get a Recreational Management position designed for me in San Ramon."
"Sounds good. I wish you luck."

After work I wanted to see the SNEAK PREVIEW of 'The River' so I drove to San Francisco. I was let down because the SNEAK was not until tomorrow night! And so...I stayed in The City and watched 'Falling In Love', starring Meryl Streep and Robert DeNiro. When I was walking to the theater and out I felt EYES checking me out. Was it the outfit of my 501's and leather camel colored jacket?
I thought, "Shit...Ugh", remembering about AIDS.

I went to NATION's in Alameda for a burger and fries 'to go'. I read my San Francisco Examiner and watched the TV series 'Falcon Crest'. It was time to turn in. Snooze.

"I never talk during music, at least during good music. If one hears bad music, it is one's duty to drown it in conversation."
-Oscar Wilde
"The Portrait of Dorian Gray"

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Three Kisses

"That's a gorgeous brain...nice activity!"
-as heard while watching
the 2009 film, AVATAR

I found a mini-journal from May 2003 when I recorded notes from fifteen films that I had seen at the Tribeca Film Festival in New York City. I thought I would transcribe the 'movie stats' over the next fifteen days (in my BLOG). Here is the first one:

THE INSIDE STORY (Australia, 2001)
Director: Robert Sutherland
Young astrophysicist Dean Olsen does not heed his uncle's advice and opens a mysterious book found in his parents' secret cellar, releasing an unimaginable dark power that he must try to contain. THE INSIDE STORY won the Australian Writers Guild Award when Sutherland was still a virtual unknown, and it has garnered tremendous response for its literate mix of mystery, romance, and supernatural thriller.

My comments: 4 STARS
The imagination of this director impressed me. I immediately felt a story behind the story and behind 'that' story... It was magical when the book wrote on its own. The movie would be an inspiration to any writer.
One line in the film that I loved was: "Writing is a 24 hour a day job."
I concur. I thought of other films like 'The Never Ending Story', 'Lord of the Rings' (the Director's influence-so he said) and 'Adaptation'. This film was original and "real". I believe the unfamiliar cast helped to make it feel all the more "real". A great beginning film to the Tribeca Film Festival 2003.

Twenty-five years ago today:

January 3, 1984
Thursday

Well, let's see. I mailed Jim Koran's card today. I sent him the scientific Teddy Bear Card with these words: "I think I know why I like you so much. We have the right chemistry."


Karyn Kossoff exchanged a few words with me. I am kind of glad we are fading in terms of calling one another and spending time together. She could easily read more into 'us' than there actually is to read. She did mention to someone on New Year's Eve that we were really good friends. And yet, she didn't hesitate to find me at midnight for the first kiss of 1985. The second kiss goes to Ron Shelly. The third kiss goes to my niece, Ashley Marie Armijo.

Today is Paloma's birthday. We were supposed to have lunch together but you know how dependable she is from past experience! So I was not relying on the Birthday lunch outing anyway. When I telephoned her we made new plans for this coming Saturday. We plan to do lunch and a flick. It ought to be fun. I always have fun with her. She has been body building a lot lately. I am ever-too-envious. I want to improve my body. There's always room to make time for it.

Work was an all right sort of day. Carl made a comment that made me realize that a morning shower is so important.
Yesterday, Carl said, "Michael, how come your eyes have been so puffy lately?"
I was completely bewildered. It must be because I didn't shower yesterday morning because I was running late. I just 'washed up'. And so, no more neglecting to take morning showers forever more.

After work I went straight home and fell asleep in front of the TV. It was a pleasurable evening. It was wonderful to be in bed. Yawn.

"His pleasures were simple."
-Nial Kent
"The Divided Path"

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Want A Piece of The Rock ?

"I understand that you don't want anyone interfering in your LIFE and I'll try not to do that. But is it all right if I continue to like you?"
-Stieg Larsson
"The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo"

Twenty-five years ago today:

January 2, 1985
Wednesday

Work was busy. I had a number of things to do today. During lunchtime I went alone to the GALLERIA for lunch. I telephoned Paloma.
"I'm going to return a Christmas present to the BANANA REPUBLIC in The City today," Paloma announced.
I didn't bother going there because I knew my chances of running into her were slim.

Who knows where Karyn ran off to on this day?

I did not mention 'working out' to Ryan Hargrave today. I should have. I want to.

I ought to talk to David Vigil about details on the Executive Health Spa. He goes there and knows more about it.

I made my appointment at the Bay Area Sperm Bank. I was not presented a check. I guess that will happen next week.
I was told, "There's only one pregnancy so far but I'll keep you posted on any other news."

I think twice now whenever I see a pregnant woman. It makes me curious. When I had met Karyn Kossoff's pal, Elizabeth, and learned that she was two weeks pregnant I began to feel suspicious. When I learned that the father was a married man she's been seeing I chalked it off to my silly notions.

I went to mom and dad's and had some spaghetti and another slice of that homemade chocolate cake. I departed feeling fat. Mom's place is bad luck for my physique.

I entered my pad and received the neatest card from Jim Koran! The card depicted a shirtless, fit man with these words imprinted on it: "Want a Piece of The Rock?"
I was surprised to find it in my mailbox. It meant a lot to me. I was especially taken by this line that he wrote:
'Your friendship means a great deal to me, Mike, and I want us to always stay close.'
However, his mention of a new 'fella' in his life that he'd met before Thanksgiving got me a bit jealous.

I decided to write him back quickly. I, in turn, mentioned Bob Umland and Karen, the waitress at Baxter's. What the heck. I will share and share alike. I want to be able to tell Jim anything going through my mind. My journal knows much more, of course.

I also received a card from Paloma. And as it turns out we are not going to get-together to see DYNASTY tonight. We are not having lunch tomorrow (her Birthday) either. I called her to see about going out one evening. I even suggested lunch sometime this weekend or next week. I told her about my friend, Ryan, wanting to work out at his gym with me. She is so 'gung-ho' about weight lifting. She wants me to do it, too.
Paloma agreed, "You should work out with him on Tuesday or Thursday. And you should ask Dave about the rates at that Executive Health Club."

After Jim Koran's card and the image of the well-built man makes me want to really get into 'working out' with weights more.

"Rules exist even for relationships."
-as heard while watching
a film called
"Saturn In Opposition"

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Peace Of Mind

"Every time I start with somebody new I can almost see the beginning and the end all at once."
-as heard while watching
the 1998 TV show "More Tales Of The City"

Thank you Kay Strauss from Minnesota for sending me this joke on Nov. 13, 2009.
It was good for a laugh:

Italian Pregnancy

An 18 year old Italian girl tells her Mom that she has missed her period for two months. Very worried, the mother goes to the drugstore and buys a pregnancy kit. The test result shows that the girl is pregnant.

Shouting, cursing, crying, the mother says, "Who was the pig that did this to you? I want to know!"

The girl picks up the phone and makes a call. Half an hour later, a Ferrari stops in front of their house. A mature and distinguished man with gray hair and impeccably dressed in an Armani suit steps out of a Ferrari and enters the house.

He sits in the living room with the father, mother, and the girl and tells them, "Good morning, your daughter has informed me of the problem. I can't marry her because of my personal family situation but I'll take charge. I will pay all costs and provide for your daughter for the rest of her life. Additionally, if a girl is born, I will bequeath a Ferrari, two retail stores, a townhouse, a beach-front villa, and a $2,000,000 bank account. If a boy is born, my legacy will be a couple of factories and a $4,000,000 bank account. If twins, they will receive a factory and $2,000,000 each. However, if there is a miscarriage, what do you suggest I do?"

At this point, the father, who had remained silent holding a shot gun, places a hand firmly on the man's shoulder and tells him.
"You gonna try again."

Twenty-five years ago today:

January 1, 1985

At 4:30AM I wanted to split the scene but I didn't. I couldn't take Ron's snoring!

Karyn Kossoff and I left by 8AM or so.

Ron asked, "How you feelin' this mornin', Michael?" He spoke with a slight overture tone, hinting about our intimate 'brief kissing' moment.

Karyn and I were happy. We had no parking ticket. I saw one car parked diagonally in front of a fire hydrant. I couldn't believe it! I drove Karyn home and before I knew it I was home. I was feeling restless. By 10:30AM I was riding up Fairmont when a CINELLI dressed 'skinny' cyclist passed me up. I had passed him earlier and he was clearly getting revenge. What a creep! Just wait until I'm in-shape again. I feel so OW (overweight) from all of my overeating an slacking off over the holidays.

I stopped to visit at my Aunt Lillian's house in Castro Valley. My cousin Shonette was there with my Grandma. Shonette gave me a Coca-Cola. It was a needed 'cooling off' refreshment after this spontaneous ride in to Castro Valley. I hung out there until Howard, Lillian and Shawn appeared. Ten year old cousin Shawn and I went cycling a bit.

I made it to my mom's house at about 3PM where I fixed myself an orange-juice flavored milkshake. Yum! I enjoyed a bowl of posole and a slice of chocolate cake. Face it, I porked out but didn't feel guilty after that speed racing ride.

I remained at mom's house until 8PM. And then, I went to Baxter's in Concord at 9PM. I was hoping to see Karen, the Cybil Shepherd lookalike. It was a dead night and she was not working tonight. It was time to vanish and rest for my work day tomorrow. Yawn.

"Have you found that 'peace of mind' you've been looking for?"
-as heard while watching
the 1946 film, 'RAZOR's EDGE'

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